You Ate WHAT?!


You Ate WHAT?! | Duluth Moms Blog

Postpartum depression is real. I know postpartum depression first hand – but not in the way you might think.

May 14 – We left Fay and Andy’s house at 9:30. It was a sad parting. Fay feels unable to cope with the baby’s care. I hope she snaps out of it when we are gone.

May 15 – Had bad news from St. Paul. Fay was taken to Mounds Park Hospital again. I feel just awful about this. Poor dear little Sarah has to be taken care of by a stranger.

These words were recorded by my grandmother in her diary, shortly after I was born. Teetering on the edge of mental health already, my mother – overwhelmed by hormones, exhaustion, the challenges of having a newborn and toddler at home along with a strained marriage – completely broke down.

Yes, like so many others, I am a child of postpartum depression.

After somehow managing with me at home for about three weeks, my father arranged for me to stay with Grandma until my mom recovered enough to come home from the hospital.

July 30 – Sarah, Fay and Andy left at 10:15. It was hard to see Sarah go – how I miss her. I hope she is resting well in her room in St. Paul. Fay looks so well now.

What a blessing it was to have been cared for by my dear grandmother! As a child, I always thought it was interesting that she and her sister had so many stories about me when I was a baby. I suspected that I was extra special to Grandma, but it wasn’t until I was much older when I discovered the reason why.

Still, there are consequences from a child being separated from his or her mother at such a young age. Research suggests that prolonged separation of infant from mother it can result in struggles with anxiety and in developing secure attachments with others later in life. Sounds about right. Once I learned the story of how my life began, it was a comfort to know there was a reason behind some of the challenges I have faced in life.

Fast forward to six years ago. When I found out I was pregnant, my joy was soon tempered by concerns about postpartum depression. Would it happen to me? What could I do to prevent it? I was terrified that postpartum depression was my destiny because my mom had suffered so severely from it.

Fear turned quickly to determination. I was going to do all I could to protect myself, and my baby, from postpartum depression. I worked to stay healthy, both physically and mentally, throughout my pregnancy. I ate well, exercised and did not allow myself to become overly stressed about anything. Which was no easy feat. During this time, my husband and I sold a house and had to re-finance our current mortgage at our expense due to a banker error. I also developed severe lower back and sciatica pain. And, just a few short months before my daughter was born, my father passed away.

One day, while visiting my chiropractor, I mentioned my fears of postpartum depression. She told me she had just heard of an alternative therapy that involves ingesting one’s placenta after delivery.

Say whaaaaaaat?

Oh…that’s what I thought you said.


Ok, I know what you’re thinking…and you can put that mental fork and knife back into the drawer now, thank you.

Its called “Placenta Encapsulation,” and it involves processing the placenta, sometimes with various herbs, dehydrating it, grinding it into a powder and putting the powder into gelatin capsules. Typically performed by a doula or midwife, this treatment option is as simple as swallowing a pill. With a slight aftertaste.

The philosophy behind ingesting one’s placenta, known as maternal placentophagia, is that a lot of the vitamins, hormones and everything else that goes into growing that precious baby is stored in the placenta. Once the baby is born and the placenta is outside the mother’s body, she might experience strong physiological effects from losing those nutrients and hormones. Ingesting the placenta is thought to return these essentials to the mother’s body, countering effects of postpartum depression and actually helping boost the mother’s energy and breast milk production. It is also thought to help the uterus return to its original size. These effects are largely anecdotal; there is little scientific research to support the validity of these claims.

When I heard about maternal placentophagia, I had a rush of emotions. Hope. Disgust. Curiosity. Hesitancy. Disbelief. Courage. Determination. I considered the alternatives: Postpartum depression? No, not interested. Antidepressants? Most of the information I found on the internet stated the risks to baby from maternal depression far outweigh the risks from ingesting breastmilk from a mom taking an antidepressant. Still, as a person who chooses to take as few pharmaceuticals as possible, I was hesitant to take a chance on thinking a drug was safe only to discover later it had an adverse affect on my baby. And, I reasoned, there doesn’t seem to be any drawbacks to…um, ingesting my ground-up dehydrated placenta and if it didn’t prevent postpartum depression, I could always work with my doctor to find an appropriate antidepressant. After a few weeks of hemming and hawing, I decided to pick up the phone and call the number given to me by my chiropractor.

The doula I talked to was wonderful. In her calm, gentle and reassuring manner, she explained the process very thoroughly. After talking with her, it seemed (almost) reasonable and quite natural to ingest my ground-up dehydrated placenta.

Ok, I was sold. Now comes the hard part. Telling people about it.

I don’t know what the deal was but I just could not bring myself to tell anyone about this. Except, of course, my husband. I wish I could have taken a picture. His expression was classic: A mixture of confusion, horror and disgust all rolled into one. And mentioning it once was quite enough for him. He’s got the most sensitive gag reflex I have ever seen. Just the mere thought of something gross gets his gagger going.

So, that was it. Until now, my husband was the only person I told about this, outside of the hospital staff, who took the request to save my placenta in stride.

You Ate WHAT?! | Duluth Moms Blog

Though there is a lot of awareness now about postpartum depression, its symptoms and treatment options, there is still a pretty big stigma connected to placentophagia. At least I think there is. I guess I don’t really know because I have never talked with anyone about it. It certainly isn’t something you hear about in the general course of going about having a baby.

So, I am going to break the chain and speak out. I am going to shout it from the rooftops and tell the world that I ATE MY PLACENTA, and I loved how it made me feel and I did not get postpartum depression!

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Sarah VanderMeiden
A native of St. Paul, Minnesota, Sarah is a dyed-in-her-wool-socks Minnesotan whose life-long love of woods and water drew her to move to Duluth 23 years ago this November. An avid hiker, she loves to explore all locales on Lake Superior’s shore, snowshoe frozen North Shore rivers and go for walks in Duluth’s Lester Park. Working in Higher Education for over 20 years, Sarah’s greatest joy was to talk with students about how to navigate the challenges of college, what they wanted to do with their lives and how to make their dreams come true. After stepping out of this career to be a stay-at-home-mom, Sarah has returned to her passion of helping people achieve their personal and professional goals as a Board Certified Coach. To find out more about coaching and her background, visit or find her on Facebook at Sarah VanderMeiden Coaching . Sarah’s family lives in the country and share their five acres with a small flock of laying hens, deer, wild turkey, way too many mice and 10,000 honeybees. Sarah has given up gardening and keeping her house clean to pursue her many interests including enjoying the lake, singing, photography and spending time with her family camping in their vintage travel trailer or tickling each other on the couch.


  1. I had severe PPD with my first 3 children. It was horrible. I felt like I couldn’t be a good mother to my children, and thoughts of running away and never coming back flooded my mind. I couldn’t connect with my newborns. I was crying for what felt like every waking moment, every day for several weeks after they were born. I did get past it eventually and always have been able to bond and enjoy my kids after those first few harrowing weeks, but they were debilitating. I was scared when I was going to welcome our 4th child into the world. I knew what was coming, and I wanted to prevent it in every way I could. I do birth photography, and one of my clients had her placenta encapsulated after birth. Her doula spoke to me of the benefits, specifically of the prevention of PPD. I immediately signed up for it and after my daughters birth, had her pick up the placenta and encapsulate it. I had ZERO symptoms of PPD after her birth. When I felt the sensation of hopelessness coming on, I would take 2 capsules and it would diminish in quite literally 30 mins. I bonded with my baby like I never have before. I was happy. I smiled every day. I had more energy than ever, and I’ve never healed so fast after birth. I attribute all of this to placenta encapsulation. It was magic. It changed my life. We are currently planning on trying for another baby in the future. And I’m not scared this time. I’m excited.

    • Ashley – thank you so much for sharing your story and for so clearly explaining both the debilitating effects of postpartum depression and how you felt taking the placenta capsules. What an amazing difference! I am so happy you have found something that works for you! It is my hope that all mothers can at least become aware of this option so they can choose it if they believe it would help them. All my best – Sarah

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