Back in May I took a 2 night trip up the Shore by myself. I needed a few days to not be touched or needed by another human. I was so ready to be done with breastfeeding that there were nights I would sit in my son’s room crying after being in there for over an hour with a toddler that wouldn’t unlatch or go to sleep. I felt like I was at a tipping point and I had to get away to breathe and reset, allowing space to be whole again for myself and my family.
I thought that those few days away would finally help my son loosen the grips on his security blanket (aka my boobs), but when I returned we fell back into a similar, although more limited, routine. I felt disappointed at first, wishing it could have been any easy transition away from nursing and tried to limit his time attached to me each day. Then fairly quickly, I realized that I no longer felt frustration as I continued to find myself in his room each night.
Now, nearly 3 months later, not much has changed. My son is now closer to 2.5 than 2 and I do realize that sooner rather than later, I will have to force an end date (which I wish would just come naturally, but have no hope of actually happening). For now, I think we still appreciate the comfort we provide each other and honestly, I’m not sure which one of us needs it more.
I am continually grateful for the ease that has accompanied breastfeeding with my son, which makes it easy for me to be more fluid and open with our journey, but for those struggling, I see you too. I spent 16 very difficult months breastfeeding my daughter and I cannot believe we made it that long.
Whether it’s one day, one month, one year, never discredit the work your body did and what you gave your child. I’m here to cheer you on, however you get that babe fed!
– Duluth Mom Contributor, Sarah Herrick- Smíšek